You fool! It’s time to prep, brainiac! It’s a couple dollars! But it’s the best dollars you haven’t spent on a post apocalyptic survival guide since you knocked up your girlfriend back in ’82! Don’t make the same mistake twice! The Apocalypse Tuesday Survival Guide for Beginners!
Gone are the days when you lived in fear of a Zombie Apocalypse or a corporate takeover of the ENTIRE WORLD! Now you can live in the peace of perpetually prepared-for paranoia as you mold and shape your plans for a new life when the poo poo is slung against the proverbial rotating blades of destiny!
Look at you. You probably don’t even have an EAP!! What a facepalm! You are in serious need of this zombie apocalypse survival guide book! I can’t believe you’re not dead already!
Don’t waste another minute, buy this “book” and take the first step to a better life!
The Apocalypse is coming, quite possibly on this very Tuesday! Buy this apocalypse survival manual and prepare to survive…or otherwise be prepared to get your life leg humped by the hellhounds of a merciless future in the barren soils of the New American Frontier!
History repeats itself, dummy! Now get in it or get out of the way!